Have you ever wondered what makes people tick, what makes them act the way they do?
Some people say that’s just the way they are. Others point to psychological
theories that interpret an individual’s behaviors based on a man-made list of
inherited traits created by psychologists correlated to universal personality
types that they justify each person fall into - which we usually accept as the
common rational. However after reading Goffman’s articles, it could be argued
that there may be more going on than meets the eye. And that’s because once
again our recurring social norms come into play and influence our daily
behaviors and we usually don’t realize them after awhile because we become
conditioned and accustomed to them.
Although I enjoyed reading both of Goffman’s articles, I prefered more specifically
focused on Goffman’s views featured in his article “Presentation of Self and
Impression Management.” The way people behave while in the presence of others
and the side of them they keep hidden or only reveal to their closely tied
relationships. It could be perceived that society has turned people into two
separate entities locked up in the same anatomy.
A oppressed true self that is unacceptable to the gender or societal norms and
behaviors lives within all of us, whether we’d like to admit it or are oblivious
to it. Goffman pulls the blindfold from our eyes by revealing his somewhat
harsh, but true theorization that we have become actors in the life we live. In
many cases we have compromised our values and beliefs in an endless attempt
toward adequate assimilation.
We have put on social acceptable personas to attract and maintain bond with
friends, lovers, and acquaintances. If we were to show our true selves to these
people or society we risk being viewed as strange, inferior, or completely
social rejected by the people we desire to be close to. “ Let us now turn from
the others to the point of the individual who presents himself before them. He
may wish them to think highly of him, or to think that he thinks highly of them,
or perceive how in fact he feels toward them, or to obtain no clear-cut
impression; he may wish to ensure sufficient harmony so that the interaction can
be sustained or defraud, get rid of, confuse, mislead, antagonize, or insult
them. Regardless of the particular objective which the individual has in mind
and of his motive for having this objective, it will be in his interests to
control the conduct of others, especially their responsive treatment of him (
Goffman, pg 3, 1959).”
interpreted Goffman’s except as him to say that we objectively stride toward
pleasing the needs of others and abiding to social norms that we deny outerly
expressing the true aspects of us, that make us, well... Us. In order to be
accepted by society we mask our true selves with a socially acceptable face so
we can deliver that best perception or illusion of ourselves onto others. In
turn we bury our true self deep within ourselves and react indifferent to our
true selves and abide by cultural norms.
Case in point Goffman illustrates the socially institutionalization of girls and
college girls more specifically, which is still very relevant to the present
day, “a girl who is called to the telephone in the dormitories will often allow
herself to be called several times, in order to give all the other girls ample
opportunity to hear her paged ( Goffman, pg 4, 1959).” Goffman’s excerpt leaks
out a situation I know all too well. Just like many guys I have called or text
girls I adored and waited patiently for them to reciprocate calling on them.
Society has undoubtedly stroked the ego of women into believing they hold all
the cards, believing the whole world is there to please the wants of women and
men are just tools to be used and taken advantage of. Women have used this
method of anticipation and uncertainty to weed out the ‘less worthy’ and gain an
edge over male dominance and to weaken the given male’s self-esteem and fill it
will doubt and insecurity.
But returning to a less cynical and more universal aspect, of each person which
Goffman states where the person as “present himself in a light that is favorable
to him , the others may divide what they witness into two parts; a part that is
relatively easy for the individual to manipulate at will, being chiefly his
verbal assertions, and a part in regard to which he seems to have little concern
or control ( Goffman, pg 7, 1959).” Which I perceive as Goffman saying that
people actively participate in performing in their daily lives to receive the
desired response from a given group of society.